Well, I got the house back in order yesterday. It’s still got about an hour of work left in it, but I pooped out yesterday. All of the holiday stuff is loaded and stored. Laundry was started. Dishes done. It was a good day off, and am kind of glad to go back today. kind of. moneywise…desperate! So, I’m off to work today. Cross fingers for being busy!

Here’s something new.

Kikimama was being her needy self yesterday. In my lap constantly. Following me from room to room. So I have to go tinkle, and she follows me into the bathroom, and I fully expect her to jump in my lap. Not unheard of at this house. Instead she jumps into the bathtub. I pull back the curtain and she is positioned perfectly over the drain…AND SHE’S PEEING TOO!!! IN THE FREAKIN DRAIN OF THE BATHTUB!!!

what in the screamin hell is going on with that cat?

that’s all I got today. Happy Saturday. Enjoy the weather if you’re local. Gonna be gorgeous here today, upper 60’s. Tomorrow the bottom drops. gah.

Saw two great movies yesterday. Four Christmases, yes a little late in the season, but fun. I actually found myself a little emotional about it. Of course it stands to reason, coming off of the holiday, and the movie dealing with fractured families….anyways. It was great. The cast was stellar, all of the principals except Vince Vaughn, have been nominated/awarded an Academy Award. I know, right? crazy.

We then hopped over into the Benjamin Button movie and let me just say, yes. it’s long. but in my opinion…totally worth it. every minute. It was heartbreakingly lovely. Tender and kind and layered and just really a great story. I encourage you all to give it a cookie lookie.

Ran by the store for a few essentials then came home to just be a little lazy. Today is my day of organizing and getting clear for the new year. Taking down all the Christmas. Getting the tree outta here, i need to research on how to dispose of it. Ex Him used to just dump it in the bar dumpster…hmmmm. will figure it out.

This year is already setting up to be a social one. Going to see a friends band tonight. Tomorrow our Colts are in the playoffs. Sunday is play committee meeting. Working next week, Thursday OU plays in the Championship game, Saturday after work MGirl and I are heading to her hometown of Tulsa to spend a little time in her stomping grounds. WHEW! I have auditions coming up on the 17th. well. That’s a Saturday, so I’ll go on the 18th. I’m excited about it. I’m picking up more scripts to read on Sunday…hmmmm. I’ve got to get a copy of one of my photos from the NYC shoot…

so anyways, I digress. I’m going to have one more cup of coffee, a little bite to eat then hit this house with the cleaning stick. I’ll check in and let ya know how goes it!

what are you doing today?

2009.

has a lovely ring to it, yes?

I have but a few minutes, and promise more details and topical discussion when I get back from the movies. I just wanted to touch base, tell you I had a GREAT NYE. Went over to M’Lynns and hung with the Gal Pals. We had a lovely meal, with proper crystal and place settings. We sang Taylor Swift and danced in the kitchen. We laughed. We laughed more. We sat by the fire. We counted down and went outside to toast champagne glasses and look at the sky on the first second of the newyear.

The party wrapped shortly after that first second but M’Lynn and I, true to form, stayed up and sang more Taylor, added in some Trisha, finished up with some Pat Green and danced and cleaned the kitchen and talked and sung and danced more. I got home sometime after three in the a.m. and slept till noon. Blessed blessed friends!!!

No, there weren’t any NYE kisses, but that’s ok. I have recently discovered that I am in a committed relationship. I can’t be off kissing just anyone.

on that note…I’m getting more coffee and putting myself in the shower. Then gathering with Joe, Gert and MGirl for some cinema therapy!

MUAH to you and yours. This is the best time of the year,everyone starts fresh. I’ll tell you my thoughts and goals for this year in a later post, but I would love to hear what yours are?

Thirty Two.
Thirty Two people attended this party. The door was revolving. The house was bursting. Chrome’s head was spinning. We even arranged for a surprise visit from Shua our friend we worked with in the summer of 97 to drive in from Arkansas and stay the weekend! I fondue’d for the first time and I believe it was a success.

There were many many an eclectic folk here, and while I feel like I need to be better at introducing people and helping them find their place at the party, I think it was ok. I will work on that in the future. As well as having a photographer handy. No pictures. not one single shot. That sucks. So for the summer gathering, we’ll be better at that.

For those of you that came, thank you! For those of you that missed it, you were missed!

Shua left this morning. Chrome left a few hours ago. I am still in my pajamas. Just finished the last bit of Oceans Thirteen. slurp. I need to run some money thru the bank but that is the only thing I have today until comedy tonight.

Tomorrow we have the Holiday Bowl game. Oklahoma State! Wahoo! then holy crap. it’s NYE. I was going to entertain again, but ya’ll….I’m kind of done with it. For the year. So I am having dinner with M’Lynn and the Gal Pals, then I don’t have any plans.

what are you doing???

I’m moving to the couch now. Happy Monday.

So. I went to bed early last night. Seems to be something I’ve been doing lately. early to bed early to rise…but this morning the big wave of weather swept thru the plains and it came a frog strangler!!! Hail! Wind! Wet Cats! 4:30 am and we’re up, we’re awake! gah…

so the cats came in, and laid on the towel I put down for them to dry on. I did the dishes and started some laundry and facebooked a little then went back to the bed. Slept a few more hours and back up. Coffee, glorious coffee, and some sausage balls for breakfast with just a bite of dressing. I know. I’ve put the roast on to cook and am here, really, to just do a mental checklist for tonights party. I have lost some steam and by sitting here, watching the Band of Brothers marathon on the History Channnel, I feel like I”m doing something productive. Let’s see what we’ve got to do yet, shall we?

pick up house and vaccume. (just a few bits left on that)
grocery store and liquor store
prep chili and fondue
sweep out garage and set up some chairs
set up bar area in back room

methinks that’s all really. just the rest of the cooking, which can’t be done till later this afternoon anyways. so, ok. I’m doing good on time. fabulous.

I’ll just tuck in here a little while longer for some rest, then get up and get showered and go to the store.

Did I tell you I’m doing fondue? bought myself two pots yesterday. have perused the interweb for recipes, both cheese and chocolate. I’ve been hardpressed to find some without alcohol. I have recovering alcoholics in the mix tonight and while I know that the alcohol cooks out…gah. rather just not go there. anyways, I think I found two really slurpy good ones. Will report on that tomorrow!

Home from the holiday. Home and unpacked and scattered from one end of the house to the other. Had a grand time with Wonderboy and Wonderbaby. Wii’d ourselves silly. Ate as if your lives depended on it. Brought tons home for Chromecoming 08 and for snacking next week. Fed the livestock and am settling in on my couch to enjoy the tree for a bit longer.

Tomorrow brings cleaning and picking up and prepping for the party. I enjoy stuff like that. Facetime with friends. Everybody gets to share in the crazy.

I hope you are enjoying the aftermath of the holiday, maybe you’re snuggled up at home, someone elses or your own. Maybe you are with family, or with friends or both. Maybe you’re catching your first glimpse of quiet this week. I raise this glass of sprite zero and toast you my friends.

Enjoy.

Gah. Just got the phone call. Wonderboy telling me he got a Wii from Santa and oh my gosh we have some playin to do so get on over here fast Aunt Zelda FAST!!!!!

I’m gulping coffee and taking a moment on the computer to wake up. Once I go over there I have to fight the kid for comptuer time. anyways…WEEEE for a Wiiiii!!! There will be fun photos to share I’m sure.

Last night was good for me. came to Mom’s house, snacked on some good snacks, talked and curled up with Milli the wonderdog. Decided to just sleep here and so, as part of tradition had myself a little helping of the xanax and went right to sleep. at 8:30!!!!! GOD I love some good sleep.

so, I’m off to my sisters. I have to de-bone the turkey. Contrary to the fact that she has two children and I have none, she doesn’t touch bones and I can do it with my eyes closed.

heh heh heh. little family humor!!!

Merry Christmas to all of you. I love you for being a part of the Circus, and part of my life. May your day be full of blessings that continue thruought the next year.

I’ll be back here when I can! I’m going back home tomorrow and then it’s Chromecoming 08 on Satuday so will have lot’s to report. But for today….peace.

Peace.

All set! have successfully putzed and lazed and picked up and laundried the morning away and into the afternoon. Things left to do.

actually pack some clothing items and cleaning bits.
put stuff in car.
feed and water cats. clean toilet so that they can drink tomorrow.
clean and clothe myself.
get gas in Bella.
deliver one last pressie
get on the road
stop at the QT in Tulsa for coffee and tinkle break
drive on.
arrive at Bella Vista around dinner time
visit and relax
play Canta Slaus tonight…can anyone say Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hope you are all where you need to be. I hope you’re not still stuck in traffic or in airports. I hope you have a full and blessed Christmas. I hope I see a lot of your faces on Saturday night. I hope that you get some good foods and some good love and some good laughing. I must be off of this machine, else I’ll never get on the road.

Merry Christmas ya’ll!!!

with much love,
Zelda

I don’t write things here to hurt you.
I don’t write things here for you at all.
I don’t write things here to subtly try to tell you how I feel.

If you are one of the four blessed humans that have been given the role of a parent in my life then you know I don’t have a lot of patience in censors. or in patience.

this is a place for me.
I welcome your visiting the circus.
I love that you read my words and my thoughts and my heart.
It gives us a chance to know.

The previous post, and each and every post up until now and every post in the future is mine. It is not censored. It isn’t anything but me. I don’t put things here to harm or to hurt or to poke. I put the words here to heal. Me. Me. Me. ME. MINE.

My circus of crazy. My circus of nuckin futs. My circus of FAMILY.

So. Please. read. laugh. comment. enjoy.
and with all of that know and damnit I mean KNOW that nothing here is poking or jabbing or nanny nanny boo booo ing. I’m not trying to tell you something between the lines. I don’t do lines. I am a right brained Scorpio who happens to be a blonde educated hair stylist. I don’t do lines.

What I want to convey, most succinctly is this. I don’t do anything here to hurt you. . . but times…and there are times…I am hurt. I AM HURT. Me me me me. Myspace. Myface. myblog.

read at your own risk. because…

that
is
how
i
write.

with love.

Around this time of year, I do a lot of thinking. A lot of stressing. A lot of laughing and a lot of reflection on the previous year. As a person genetically predispositioned to hate any type of good-bye, it’s a little weird that I love the last few weeks of a year as much as I do. The impending fresh start is what gets me through.

Anyways, this week I’ve been reminiscing a lot about family. What it is? What does it consist of. What exactly does it mean to be a part of one. . . sharing blood and DNA? sharing life or death experiences? a last name or a bed? showing tears and fears and emotions usually kept under wraps? public farting? private fighting? Is is the person who used to spank the life blood out of you to teach you lessons, or the person who gave quiet advice and understanding? Which of these are family…I ask you.

For those of you that know me, that have spent any amount of time with me, you know that the holidays are the best of times and the worst of times. And if anyone out there thinks that there is a time limit for children of divorce to “get over it” then you clearly are not a child of divorce, adult or not. Not to mention a child of two. And look, folks, I’m not holding a pity party for myself and inviting you to come along for the cheery ride. I’m just telling you that for the last twenty or so years, Christmas has been fucked up twelve ways from Sunday. It’s stressful. It’s crazy. It’s early or it’s late or it’s a day or it’s a few hours or it’s sometimes…not at all. It makes my heart hurt, and it makes me cry and makes me long for a family of my own to make happy instead of trying to make everyone else’s day happy. I get strung out like a paint huffer at Home Depot. But–it’s life. It’s what it was, is, and always will be. It’s been this way longer than it hasn’t.

Christmas, as taught by my mom, is when we can be together. The week before, or the actual day, or a few hours here then a few days there. It’s about family. And about love and light and blessings and recognizing the love that is all around. It’s grabbing a beer with your best friend for an hour and just laughing. That’s Christmas with Family. or unloading furniture in the dark of night after a ridiculous drive from Texas…that’s Christmas with Family. or sitting across a table and watching someone perform onstage and being the only one getting the jokes…that’s Christmas with Family…or looking at your phone and seeing the texts asking if you’re ok…that’s Christmas with Family…it’s hanging and then re-hanging lights on a house on consecutive weekends because it is important…that is Christmas with Family…it’s making umpteen phone calls saying what are you bringing? what can I bring? who brought the wine?…that’s Christmas with Family…it’s having a house full of people, friends old and new even after the 25th is long gone…that’s Christmas with Family. it’s knowing that you are loved. Truly loved. by people who are blood and by people who would get bloody for you.

This is a hard time of year for a lot of people. Some days, I’m included in that. People are worried about money and are losing jobs and are figuring out how to just get out of bed every day. Some days…I’m included in that too. It’s easy to hurt feelings and it’s easy to get hurt because it’s easy to focus on what I don’t have. yet. anymore. But then I stop, and get really quiet and clear, and realize that yes. I am loved. I am blessed. Christmas with Family…I wish you love and light and blessings and laughter this week. Remember…you are mine. I am yours.

family.