LOVE FRIDAY: Sweet Child(s) O Mine

She’s back.

At 3:45 this morning I heard scratching on my window. I jumped out of bed and ran to the back door and ran outside and seriously, it could have been a boogie man but I didn’t think twice. That’s how she says let me the frack inside, and sure enough she ran like the devil was chasing her right into the kitchen and started eating crunchies!

Then Sammy woke up and felt like HE needed crunchies. have you ever seen a cat eat in his sleep? sigh. Then they started hissing at each other so I threw Sammy in the bed with Stormy and tried to lay back down as Kiki had settled in on the couch. Then the boys started growling. and we were ALL in the living room in separate corners at 4am. Pretty sure it was the fresh catnip from the Frontier that had the boys’ tied in knots. Keeks was just annoyed I think. She seems fine, was scratching her ears pretty fierce, so I treated her for mites which IMMEDIATLY pissed her smooth off. I can’t win for losing with that girl.

I seriously thought she was gone. Gah…..sigh.

So this morning, after a special trip to wallgreens for fresh makeup for me (I’ve been scraping the bottom of the bottles with my makeup brush) and moist food for them, it’s time for coffee and gearing up for the day. I don’t go in until 10 and thank the GOOD LORD, I did get to go back to sleep for an hour or two and slept HARD.

I have to tell you about rollerskating with my Wonderboy.

OHHHHH THE ADVENTURES WE HAVE…

Ok. so. Yukon on Wheels, our local rink in Bonusmom’s town…not open on a random Thursday night. Boo. She hunts around and does find one on the Southside. Ok. Whatever. It’ll be fine. We’ll go, we’ll skate, we’ll laugh it’ll be great!!! GRRRRRREAT!!!

I get off work, after two SUPER powerhouse busy days, at 7pm. I don’t get down there till almost 8. I get in, and I swear to GOD, there are 500 small, loud screaming, shreeeeeeeking, nasty ass booger filled gross little creatures ON WHEELS!!!

Oh shit the bed. I must have looked a little wild eyed, and the kind kid behind the desk said I could search for my people before I paid…and all of a sudden I saw them both. Over at the edge, gripping the wall as if it held the secrets of Life. Wonderboy being lead around by a Big Boy with a Whistle. Bonusmom skuttling around as best she can…lips muttering the Lords Prayer under her breath.

Ok. If she can do this, so can I. I paid my 4.50 and then the lady asked me…”are you with the roller derby?”

I wish I had a picture of what I looked like because THAT, combined with that question, made for a ridiculous moment. I just watched Whip It last weekend, so I didn’t know if I should take this as a compliment…or something else. I assured her I was not with the derby and took my skates over and bought my locker and found my people.

Wonderboy wanted a drink. Ok. We will skate over and get us a drink.

Bwa ha ha ha ha. Skate over. HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA HA!!! We scuttled over, gripping the wall, three by three, like some sort of awkward Noah’s Ark line…and those little booger-filled banshees? ZOOMING by. ZIPPING thru. and just falling down in front of us. OH MY GOD. The screaming. The zooming. ELEVENTYGILLION of those little freaks.

My nerves were just shot by the time we got the 10 feet to the snack shop. I got rootbeers and the kid a hotdog and this other little kid started begging money. Hey Lady. Can I have a dollar?

no. no you cant.

then the pimply faced kid in a wife beater was flirting with the snack bar girl. Both had enough grease on their face to cook french fries…she’s flirting. he’s flirting. he only had two dollars. she gave him a large coke and a slice of pizza anyways.

I am just trying not to fall down.

I. Hated. Everybody.

I wanted to remove my skates and go the fuck away from that place that was SURELY built on a Hellmouth.

But here’s where it gets good. Wonderboy, fortified with rootbeer and hot dog, was a little weepy about how sucky this was. Not easy. Not fun. Too crowded. Too loud. We talked about trying new things. About how NEXT TIME at our smaller (quieter) rink in Yukon, how it will be easier, because we’ve already done it once. About how, we can either remove our skates (pleasepleasepleaseplease) and walk to the other side and go eat real (not snackbar) pizza, or we can skate around a bit and see how we feel.

The kid decides to skate.

Well. If he can do it, so can I. I immediatly told that Adult Voice that wanted to go away from that place to shut the fuck up, and I got my Wonderboy and my Bonusmom, and we skated.

we skated.

around several times. hugging the wall, but that was ok.  At one point I heard this little voice behind me say, Excusemeexcusemeexcusemeexcuseme…

I looked behind and it was another little tiny wallhugger who apparently wanted to pass us.

Sorry kiddo. this is as good as it gets. just slow your roll.

on the carpet a lot.

and it was good.

We did remove our skates eventually, and found a Chicago Pizza place and had a “big cheese pizza” at 9pm on Spring Break, and made plans for the Great Wolf Lodge in the summer, and talked of our adventures this week and cheers’d each other.

We said goodbyes at 10pm, and all wearily made our way back to the Northside…or as I called it Civilization. (yes. I know. I’m snobby. I was tired and you have no idea how many kids there were in that metal building…)

At the end of the day, I had spent great time with my kiddo. And my cat came home.

Wouldn’t it be great if we all had a little 8 year old Wonderboy to muster up our 8 year old courage and stamp out the 39 year old scaredy cat voices?

Happy Love Friday, ya’ll.