So, I’ve often suspected of infidelity on his part throughout this relationship. Some things I have a gut feeling about. The when’s where’s who’s are of no consequence and there is no “why didn’t I leave sooner” going on. Now is the time and so be it. But tonight I had a conversation with a girl who I enjoy quite a lot. We hung out at the bar, her husband has fixed my a/c on more than one occasion.
Apparently, he’s moved on. And fast. There was someone all over him on Saturday night, and she was wearing a wedding ring. The night before I broke up with him, he left with two six packs and his ex girlfriend. The one before me. I found that out about thirty minutes after I broke it off and left the house that morning.
Bleagh. Ewwwwwww. Gross.
I feel grossed out by that. The corpse ain’t even got the rigomortis and DAMN!
On the other hand, had there been ANYONE to kiss this weekend, I’d have totally done it.
But I have a grossed out pit in my stomach…and while I know there is no understanding or explanation, and who-the-hell-cares-good-by-and-good-riddance-to- him-I-have-done-the-right-thing-and-the-logical-side-is-the-one-that-is-in-the-driver’s-seat-now, I feel what I feel. I figured I’d write it out. Purge and Cleanse.
Chant with me people:
CLEAN SLATE! CLEAN SLATE! CLEAN SLATE!
I’m ok. but I’ve decided to unlock the dam. Un-compartment the compartmentalization that’s been so strong for the last few years. No holds barred, here it comes. I don’t need anything from this nor do I expect anything in the form of words or whatever. This is one of those situations where we all go “good game” and leave the field. I’m in a good place. I just need to get it out of my head.