It’s not really a secret. I just don’t know what it is yet. Perhaps it’s another job. Perhaps it’s another trip. Perhaps it’s a whole other place to live. Anyways, it’s not a big secret. I’m not plotting to quit my job. I’m not putting my house on the market. (the crack market at that) I’m not running off to marry Padrip after only one email…nothing quite as exciting and scandalous as that…it’s just…something. I don’t know yet. what I do know…is that I can’t seem to get out of bed to go walk, and granted it is hotter than ass here this month…my a/c didnt cool the house to 75 degrees until 4am if that tells ya anything…so I am giving myself a break. However.
I have maintained a gym membership. I pay monthly. It’s right across the street from my work. Its got air conditioning.
How the HELL am I going to wrap my head around living my most fulfilled life and being open to the wonders that are making their way towards me…if I can’t get across the street in my new shoes?
I’ve tried getting a partner to work out with, and yes it’s a good idea, but seriously it never works out. ever. for so many reasons either on their part or on mine. and anyway, I shouldn’t need that should I? I should just be able to leave the salon, get in my car, and drive across to the gym. get out of my car. go upstairs and get on a machine and sweat. how hard is that???
well. I feel sure that having sex with my George Clooney on a high holy day is an easier accomplishment. I. Feel. Sure.
I’ll quit whining now. Seriously. Sometimes I wear my own self out with it so feel free to scroll down.
Sedona. Talking to Gert this weekend a little, we need to pin down the dates of my birthday trip. . .I love the idea of not really having any set plan but for a place to stay and a trip to the Grand Canyon on my 40th birthday. Drive out. Get our rooms. Wonder about. Take a hike. Eat a meal. Have some wine…see the Canyon on the 10th. It’s a wednesday this year…I just like the idea of starting this phase of my life seeing something so magical and formidable and graceful. What I will strive to be for my next 40 years…so. My homework this week is to check calendars. Find time. I will be gone for my actual day but we will celebrate with family and friends another time perhaps the following weekend… is it too greedy to also want to have a party? It gets a little hairy the deeper into November we get *dirty!* because of football schedules and holidays and bla bla bla fishcakes. Whatever. It’ll work out right? after all…
I’ve got the shoes.
and btw kids? I’ve just written myself into going to the gym. Right Meow. Peace out. Happy Humping Day. Huzzuah and Halakaleem and I love George Clooney.

Today’s NFTU…was worthy of adding here today.
You can choose to go, do, be, and have, and in the end you’ll exclaim, shocked and bewildered, that because of all the synchronicities of your life, all the “clicks” and “coincidences,” and the many happy “accidents,” your bounty and good fortune must have been your destiny.
Or, you might choose to wait for a miracle, a savior, or divine intervention, and in the end you’ll exclaim, shocked and bewildered, that because of all the synchronicities of your life, all the missed chances and disappointments, and the many unhappy accidents, your lack and misfortune must have been your destiny.
Misti, do you see what the difference is?
It ain’t me,
The Universe
Might not be greedy enough.
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