Have you ever had a teensy tiny thought trickle into your brain? More importantly, while your brain is made up of mostly ice cold Stella Artrois and laughter, and beautiful words flowing back and forth with people that you love and your barriers and negative voices are down and out…that teensy tiny thought trickles in and plants itself. Tucks itself away behind the dirty jokes and the biscuits and gravy and just….sits.
Every day it digs in deeper and deeper. Past all the “what if’s”. Pushes through all of the “there’s no way’s” . Streaks naked through the “You Can’t’s” and flips off the “You’re Too Old’s” and finally reaches the finish line…high fives all around from the “We’ve been waiting on you’s” and “You CAN’s”
I’m somewhere between the there’s no way’s and the high fives.
This grad school thing? It’s running. It’s something that hasn’t left my head or my heart since it snuck in. I’m seeking counsel from those who know me, who’ve been down this path before me. There’s more to seek. More information to gather. I still have more unanswered scary “there’s no way’s” doing synchronized swimming in my brain than I have the peppy cheery “this is how you’ll pay for it’s”…but we’re making forward progress.
There are lots of things I can do that would be easier than this. Any of the big oil and gas companies…the Big C here in town…any of that would reap muy benefits, and a steady income. But I haven’t moved forward on any of that. It’d be easy to go get a “grown up job”—so why am I sitting here with this beautiful morning outside, crying because I’ve just read words of encouragement from my true mentors? The thought of being back in my world of academia, of being around like minded and like hearted people, of eventually going to work and talking about A.E. Houseman and Joseph Campbellforcryingoutloud…
I got into hair because I wanted money. And I wanted to work in a place where there was teamwork and support and laughter. And I wanted to have the freedom to come and go as I choose. And the most important…because I loved talking to people. I love making people feel good…letting them see themselves in a new light.
Isn’t that what great literature and art does for us all?
I’ve got a lot of work to do until we turn this bitty piece of sand into something wearable…but I thought you’d like to know where I’m headed with it.