I awoke last night about 4am, and was either cold, having an allergy attack, or a panic attack. I got up and put on some clothes and another blanket on the bed, took a claritin, sneezed a million times, and went back to bed where my mind raced about deadlines. Taxes are next week, 10 days away. I’ve yet to even begin to deal with mine. I will have a tax bill due, payments to make etc. Im calling my lady today to file an extension. Also, we’re in the MONTH OF APRIL. I knew that. I did. But the fact that it’s the FINAL MONTH OF THE SEMESTER shot right through me. So last night I began counting papers that will be due within the next few weeks. I think I’m up to 5 plus a project/report of some kind. Holy hell.
I moved to the couch, and did fall asleep.Woke up with a neck crick and mind racing once more. We’re supposed to find out today or tomorrow about the TA positions. There are only two available. But enrollment begins Monday, so we need to know if we should enroll in the methods of teach for TA’s class…or not.
Money is making me a little nuts. It’s going to be slim, scarily slim until the next round of student loan monies arrive in August. But everything will work out.
I think last night just was the night for everything to manifest in my panic area and throw a parade. Fire batons included.
Here’s a thing…if any of you have any extra thought energy to throw around, send me some. I’m trying to decide on a thesis subject and committee…and pretty much I’m chasing my tail. I’ve got some variables. I’ve got some thoughts. But there are more negatives and buts than yes’s and absolutes. I know it’ll come…but it needs to get here pretty soon.
2 thoughts on “Awake.”
Keep writing and it’ll come out on the page.
I am sending you good vibes, but I’ve got nothing for your thesis. Maybe something to do with the role women writers played in the suffrage movement. I don’t know, but I’m sending the idea fairies to your house.