Cleaning out the guest room closet this morning and I found one of these. It’s a subway token that I must have got on my first trip to New York City. I gave it to a friend of mine back in 97 before I left on my first tour. He put it on a chain and wore it for 3 years, until we saw each other again.
In a box full of things from that era, my Yoda Pez, heart shaped rocks, beads and sweetgrass…there it was. It wasn’t one of those moments that froze me and ripped me apart at the seams…but it did take me back.
There’s been a lot of life lived these past 12 years.
and I’m cleaning out the guest room…literally and metaphysically…prepping for another chapter.
there are moments when I think about money and the shift to the new job and what I should be doing or learning or already having figured out and I freeze. My stomach drops and I break out in cold sweat/hot flashes.
so. I’ve decided to wear this subway token on a chain. Not because I’m overly sentimental about the friend who put it there and wore it. Because I am always overly sentimental about that man. So, I can’t dwell on it or it will eat me up. I put those feelings somewhere tucked away. Safe. So, not as a reminder of him… But to remind me how far I’ve come…and where I’m going…and that the best things are only a subway ride away.