This morning thus far:

CPA. paid

Bank

Post Office

Taxes paid and mailed

Poster to be framed

Sams for provisions for the next few weeks

Gas in the car.

and home to check the mail…the mail that told me there was a hold on my bank account. So. I just got finished with two hours of running around the city dealing with an accounting screw up from Job 2. I was paid on a bank account that no longer exists. It’s a mistake. Lots of phones calls and research and then back in the office at Job 2 where the accounting person who made the mistake is going to correct it.

However, instead of an “I’m sorry this happened, I’ll cut the check asap” I got attitude. Shitty shitty attitude. As if it were MY fault.

I do not think this was a purposeful act of malicious intent. I think it was an act of incompetence, which we all suffer from time to time on account of we’re merely human. Just manage it. Own it. Correct it.

Yeah, this is going nowhere good. After being presented “shittily” with my check and fees covered, I said, “this wasn’t my fault. I don’t know why you’re treating me like it is”

Well it turned into a nice little argument. She’s one of the most unprofessional people I’ve ever seen, and damnit I hate it when people bring me to their level. Admittedly I went there for a few choice words and some stellar finger pointing but brought myself back up to end with ” I do appreciate this, and thank you for correcting it.”

Her response?

“I seriously doubt that you do.”

LORD GIVE ME STRENGTH.

My bank was gracious. The hold was removed from my account. The debits were paid instead of bouncing. It all worked out…but why did it have to be so hard?

I wonder about this job. I wonder about what I’m going to do when it ends. I have a gut feeling that it will be within the next week or two. I am going to start looking elsewhere for some extra work. And I’m going to try not to worry about it. What I AM going to do is finish filling out my paperwork and go mail my grad school application today.

I’d like to use the rest of this adrenaline rush to do something productive. I’ve done a bit in the kitchen with a bit more yet to do…but I just got this book today per Kizz’s instruction and it’s begging to be opened!

Tonight…David Sedaris live and in person! Wahoo!!!

Ok. I’m going to go put some clothes on some hangers. and light a candle or two to calm my nerves.

 

 

So, my plans to get up and to go Palm Sunday services fell right into bed yesterday and didn’t ever get up. I was running on empty. The previous week had not been a good one for sleep. I kept waking up or never sleeping at all. So yesterday after I showered, I slept. All day long. Got out of bed at 5pm and moved to the couch and thought about putting up clean clothes and organizing a closet and did neither of those.

The grill is out of gas, (on my list for today) and so I had some baked chicken, and foods from dad’s garden last year that have been waiting on me in my freezer. Corn on the cob. Fresh okra. So good. I worked on my today’s plan a little and went back to bed to watch the OKC Thunder game. I made it to half time and petered out. Slept all night long. They won their first playoff game though–YAY!!

Today is CPA appointment for taxes at 9am. Yes, I’m paying. I did get a refund from when I was an employee. A nice one. But we’re just giving it back to pay my quarterly stuff from the last two quarters as well as I’m paying some more to keep me up to date. It’s not fun but it’s the name of the game now that I’m an independent contractor. So many people I work with don’t pay in during the year and owe big fat fat at the tax deadline. Gross.

Anyways. get it done. over with. finito.

Errands for today are: fill up the grill tank with gas.

take a print to get framed.

head to lowes and get someone out to estimate new windows. buy some sprinklers and maybe garden dirt. I’m ready to plant my second garden!

There’s lots more, but I’ve gotta blaze a trail.

Peaceout. Happy Monday.

 

I showered. and then fell asleep. I dozed through two hours of 90210 and dozed through 2 hours of Gilmore Girls and then fell asleep for good and slept until 5pm.

Sweet Mercy.

Time to grill some chicken and watch the Thunder in the first round of playoffs.

Side note: the grill is out of gas. baked chicken. fried okra. corn on the cob. yummmmooo. Also? Multiple eps of How I Met Your Mother.

Ilovethisshow!!!

Are you as tired as I am?

Cuz man oh man. I’m whooped. Busy week at both jobs, bartended a wedding on Friday, crazy at the salon including prom hair on Saturday. Last night was spent with my PseudoFamily. I totally invited myself over to their house and included what I wanted to eat! We had grilled steaks, asparagus, garlic mashed potatoes and cold beer. Lots of singing and dancing with the kids. Did my heart good.

I’m sitting here this morning sipping my coffee watching my CBS Sunday Morning, gathering up the strength to get in the shower and get to church. I’m yawning. I’m sleepy. I’m getting up.

This next week we’ve got  a few fabulous things. David Sedaris is tomorrow night! I’m so excited!

Noodle has her opening night Thursday for Our Town. I’m so proud and cannot wait to be in the audience.

Friday night is a birthday party for a friend…details to come on that.

and then it’s Easter weekend.

ok. ok. ok. I’m getting up and getting into the shower. yawn. yawn. yawn.

It’s FOR SALE!!!

PleasePleasePleasePleasePlease??? Can we have it? We could have bake sales! We could all pitch in! OH COME ON!!!! What’s 9 million dollars between friends?

Tis a day of Firsts.

First day of bad weather tv in Oklahoma. And my channel’s weatherman is wearing a bedazzled red tie. I shit you not. We aren’t getting squat. Lynn and I were already on point. But it’s all east of us. Flop. We need rain so badly…my back yard is cracked plum to China.

First Kill.

Got home to a big ole pile of feathers on the floor…trailed down the hall and into the kitchen…IT WAS STILL IN THE KITCHEN!

shitshitshitshitshitdamnhell.

I did my routine. Close all doors. Opened front door. Turn off all ceiling fans. At which point, said bird jumped onto the kitchen fan and jumped from blade to blade. Then jumped on top of the fridge. Then after I opened the back door and the garage door, it flew into the hall and finally out the front door. GAH.

Dyson Vacuum, I LOVE YOU.

I’m reading the Shirley MacLaine book…and it’s interesting her chapters about synchronicity and energy. Totally parallel the chapters in The Celestine Prophecy. I like it.

I’m going to grill some chicken. And count my pennies. I want that beach house goddangit.

Catherine Zeta-Jones checked herself into the nervous hospital for Bi-Polar II disorder. She stayed five days.

This is every woman’s (that I know) dream. Just a week in the hospital with bedside service and sleep. No bills or jobs or kids or husbands or stress or noise or chatter. Just a week to get your shit together. Get a handle on that sleep deprivation you’ve been running on for over a year. Some vitamins and good joo-joo going into your body. Mandatory times for being social and some lovely padded walls and floors for when you fall right out of the bed.

I think it sounds lovely.

Last night it wasn’t Princes’ Harry and William in my dreams, but Shirley MacLaine. We were all over the place. I was reading one of her books right before I went to sleep, so that explains that. I got this one at the Half Price Books yesterday at lunch.

Also, have I told you that the lettuce and spinach in my garden are almost ready for the eating? I do believe I shall have some fresh greens with my grilled chicken tonight! YUMMMM!

This is one of my new favorite things. Totally stole it from the roommate and with just a teensy bit of real maple syrup, warmed up…it needs nothing else. SO GOOD and easy!

Aaaaand here’s one for the day. The women of rock were on the Big O yesterday. (you know I’m totally sucked into the Farewell Season) and they made me so happy with their music! Ohhhh Stevie Nicks.

She still looks amazing and her voice sounds really good. Pat Benetar, however, sounds just as good as she did when I was in the 7th grade
.

Last night, I dreamed that Prince Harry and Prince William were my cousins. Two days before the wedding we were all hanging out eating some weird lobster soup at Classics and Prince Harry looked over at me and said, “You need a husband.”

My response was, “well when you ride your little horsey up to that big church, you look around for someone and take a picture of him and send it to me.” He had an iPhone with cool photo apps.

The main thing that told me this was a dream wasn’t that I was hanging out with my cousin the Prince…but that I wasn’t pissed about not being invited to the wedding.

Seriously.

 

I didn’t sleep a wink last night. Wide awake. Tossing and turning, knowing I would pay for it today. I wasn’t even really sleepy. Just awake. Of course, I finally dozed off about the time the alarms started going off.

This morning I woke up feeling defeated and negative. I felt anxious about the impending end of Job 2 and what that will mean for me financially. I felt anxious and worried about the taxes and monies owed for my quarterly payment. And back to defeated.

But I remember, Thoughts Become Things. For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.

So. Today I’m thinking about:

Easy taxes and easily paying my payments.

Money coming in with the salon and wedding gigs enough to live and pay bills.

Getting back to working out and feeling better.

 

What are you thinking about today?

 

I fired up the grill for the first time tonight.  Cheeseburgers and grilled sweet potatoes. SO GOOD! It was the treat I wanted after a day of dealing with taxes and numbers and figuring out what I’m going to owe for self employment taxes this quarter. Receipts kept, some needed, most not needed. While I will have to pay somewhere in the 200-300 dollar range for this education, I’m doing my best to not freak out about it.

The thought of dealing with self employment taxes is enough to send me to get a “real job” –fight or flight response–and yes then my brain takes over and instead of swollowing the entire thing at once, I start taking itty bitty bites and I think it’s something I can do. A means to an end.

Dealing with money has never been my strong suit. It makes me doubt everything, but at the top of that list is myself. I doubt my intellect. I doubt my decisions. I doubt my choices for the future. It’s one of my most dysfunctional relationships…the one I have with money.

I have never ever had a good relationship with money. My parents had their own dysfunction. My dad could buy 400 dollar alligator boots, but if we spent 150 at Fashion Gal, shit hit the fan. We would sneak packages in. I would race home to get the mail before he saw the bills. Spending was something that, while it seems I can do it well, I don’t do it on myself much. New clothes, new anything…always bought with guilt. I’m sure it trickles down, doesn’t everything?

At the beginning of the year my goal was to do the Dave Ramsey thing and get out of debt. Austerity plan and all that. Right now, I’m just staying above water. It’s exhausting. Mentally draining. As if there’s a cloud hanging over me at every turn. I’m sick of it.

Wrapping my head around this whole way of life, taxes, expences, book keeping, staying on top and even ahead of the game…it’s a lot. I just don’t want to do that work all the time. I look forward to a time and a job where I won’t have to. People do it everyday, so until then I will figure it out.

Meanwhile, I’ve given all of my information to my CPA, my return will be filed and figured soon. I have to gather totals of payments from Job 2 and I’ll send that info to her for my quarterly payments…and it’ll be done. Onwards and upwards. Right?

What a night! Amid ridiculous Oklahoma gusts of wind, the redhead married his girl. The ceremony and reception were outside so seriously, that wind? Killer. Blowing flowers and centerpieces all over kingdom come. But we gathered to support Spencer and Carri and that, I think, we did in fine style. All of the comics were there. Out of towners, locals, all of us hanging out, catching up, cracking up…it was fabulous. I was so so so excited to get time with Abby. I kept saying over and over “in my head we get to just hang out every Saturday whenever we want!”

I prolly kept saying it over and over because I was a little tipsy. The wine was flowing in great gulping glasses and I was having fun, we all were just enjoying being together…I should have quit before that last glass. Hindsight.

After the bride and groom drove off to start their new life, and all the sparklers were put out we decided to go sing some karaoke. Gathering our stuff, we headed out. The horrible gusting winds, the fabulous high heels I had yet to take off, the parking lot that was a steep decline combined with that flowing wine helped me take a stumble and fall flat on my face.

Literally. On my face. I have a huge knot and scrape and bruise above my left eye. Bless Brad’s heart he helped me up, got my fabulous lip gloss that flew out of my purse. Sheesh. It was painful. I was bleeding. Today however, today I’m so stiff and sore. Muscles ache. So sleepy I kept dozing all day and I wondered if I may have concussed myself a little bit…woof. Leave it to me. Grace and dignity all the way.

I am finally, this evening, gathering the tax info. Tomorrow morning I go take my stuff to my person. I’m sure we’ll have to file an extension so I’m just not going crazy tonight. Gathering reciepts. Making a list of questions. We’ll just go from there. I cannot worry about what I don’t know, or can’t control. My person knows how to do this and will help me. (this is my mantra)

Ok. I’m going to get off of here and go back to work. The Judd’s tv show is on (of course I’ve been sucked into it. I am shameless) and Kikimama is keeping me company. I want it to get finished and be over because even though I’ve slept all day, I’m still tired and can’t wait to go to bed.

Hope your Sunday has been blessed.