So, my mom has fractured her hip. She took a fall last week, and we’re now waiting on an appointment with an orthopedic guy to see how she proceeds.

My car quit on me as I was returning library books yesterday to campus. It was 110 degrees.

After several texts and phone calls from Sean Patrick who was calming me and guiding me via the cellular waves, I got it jumped from campus police, and made it to Wal Mart (where I was going next to get an oil change, etc) where they had to replace it completely. Thank God for it being under warranty.

While I was waiting, I got the best pedicure of my life, did some grocery shopping, got all my school supplies for the last year of grad school, a monsoon of a thunderstorm blew threw OKC metro. Some neighborhoods are out of power. I feel for them. With my whole heart. But we got a lot of rain, and it cooled the temps down to 82 degrees. Seriously.

I’m reading. Lots. Trashy stuff, fun stuff. Whatever. As I see my books arrive for the fall semester, I wonder how I’m going to get it all done. Lord. But I’m getting excited. Truly.

The weekends from here to eternity are booked with bartending shifts. San Diego trip is around the corner, Harvest Fest is right behind that during Fall Break. So, it’s nice to be able to work for trips.

My brain just fizzed and shut down. I’ve deleted paragraph after paragraph. Apparently I need to quit, get more coffee and call it a post.

I’ve done very little today…I had a huge list and crossed off all of maybe three things…mostly this weekend was spent soaking up precious time with friends.

Delbert kicked some serious butt in her body competition on Saturday. So So SOOO proud of her!

Trish’s surprise birthday party went off without a hitch on Friday night. She was really surprised. It as a lovely thing for her hubby to put together and I was happy to be a part of it.

Sunday was spent soaking up the last minutes of time with her and her girls. Rileygirl was in a show and we spent the afternoon singing and laughing and watching the kids perform one helluva production of Crazy For You. I spent the night with them and we just talked and ate pizza and looked at all the boxes. There was no tearful goodbye. Just a quick hug and a talk to you later. I think she’s heading out tomorrow if everything falls into place with the movers and her car.

One of the perks of one of your best friends moving to Florida? Getting all the stuff from the freezer/cabinets/fridge/garden that she didn’t want! I’m looking on the bright side.

Things have fallen into place over here.

Student loan monies are here, there are some loose ends that need tying up and that’ll happen tomorrow. I’ll be ready to start my final year of master’s program on the 20th.

Between now and then here’s what needs to happen:

Get window fixed at Brokedown Palace

Get oil changed in car

Shop for health insurance

Get invoice for roof and send to insurance company

Put taxes together and organize office for fall semester

Set fall semester hours at salon

Check into buying a window unit for my bedroom

Get summer time flea/tick meds for August on the cats

Get eyes checked and new script for fresh contacts

Find someone to mow the backyard

Pull out the old stuff from the garden and prep for fall crops

I thought I’d get a goodly amount of those things crossed off the list today.

That did not happen.

Today was reserved for naps.

Last Friday night I was bartending a wedding. It was an interesting wedding in that there seemed to be a little underlying discord between the bride’s family and the groom’s family. There was one groomsman that started the evening off with a whole lotta MF’ers but you know what? Those dudes had been outside in 100 degree heat in full blown tuxes. I’d be spouting some MF’s too…prolly. But we bartenders are aware of this and are always at the ready with ice cold beverage and a smile.

The night was slow and but for the one MF’er, everyone was nice to us. We had conversations about the heat, about the opening ceremonies which were happening that evening, about Stillwater and the fact that I cannot cross the Payne Countyline without losing my damn mind and making fabulously poor choices. It was fine.

However, throughout the night the MF’er kept hustlin’.

“hey gimme a free shot. gimme a free drink. gimme a shot. gimme your phone number. gimme your number. gimme a free shot.”

Nevermind everyone had been drinking for free on the alcohol provided by the bride and groom.

Nevermind that this is just one of those things that bartenders deal with and you just kind of suck it up and entertain the guest and pray for the night to be over.

Nevermind that we humored him, yet he still, over and over and over kept trying to hustle us.

As the night came to a close, I used my phone to call the boss and say, we’re about finished with closing duties, and I laid the phone down on the door ledge. I was out helping the bride’s mother with questions, and looked back to see the MF’er walking in for one last free beer. As he left, he “spilled” some of his drink.

Diversion.

Fast forward about 15-20 minutes later and we discover that my phone is missing. Boss calls the groom, and says that maybe someone accidentally picked it up. One of his groomsmen was the last guy in, could he please check.

I of course, am just sick.

That’s my business phone. This is my ONLY phone. I don’t have a landline.

You know how it feels. It’s sickening.

However, I had a handle on most of it. I needed to get to a phone/computer and get my service shut off. I needed to get home and figure out how to do the iCloud stuff. I wasn’t freaking out, I mean I was sick, but knew that one of two things would happen. I would either get it back, or I would get a new phone. Maybe not a new iPhone, but I would get a new phone. Contacts would be replaced, re-entered, re-acquired. Music was on my computer. Photos were “hopefully” on the cloud. It really wasn’t life threatening, but DAMNIT I was pissed.

I have a little emergency phone loaned to me and make the 40 minute drive back to my house. Oh and this temper of mine? This rage that I keep soooo locked down?

It was gurgling.

I get home and on the iCloud app I find my phone. I didn’t understand where I was looking and at first it seemed to be in the ghetto. I wasn’t about to go. I wasn’t about to take any of my friends who had offered. It didn’t seem safe.

But then the phone moved, and I got a clear picture of where it was. It was in the DeepDeuce district. Due north of Bricktown. And good ole GoogleEarth showed me that it was on a sidewalk. NOT in an apartment…so it said.

It’s past 1am at this point, but I get back in the car, tote my laptop, go pick up Lynn (who got out of bed, got redressed and came aboard without question) and we headed downtown.

*Gurgle gurgle gurgle.*

Here’s where I wish I had an iPad.

We had to steal internet connection to update the app to see where the phone was. This was just a pain in the ass. I know we were close. I saw some of the guys. They were outside of IHop. But we couldn’t ever get a good enough connection to know for sure where the phone was. Damnit.

We gave up after about an hour, and I got home and tried to calm down and get to sleep. Saturday was a huge day at work. I had zero time to deal with this. Zero time because I was booked solid with clients and then had to go home, change clothes then head back to El Reno for another wedding. THAT was stressing me.

Gurgle Gurgle Gurgle.

I left word on the FB for someone to call the phone number and make sure I was awake. The time was wrong on the phone, the alarm was beyond setting. I was exhausted. But THANK GOD FOR FACEBOOK! My little phone rang a few times, I was up, my FB had blown up with emails and the threads on my wall were growing epic.

People were angry. People were offering help. People were offering phones. People were offering support and love. It really was a beautiful thing to behold…humbling.

I got to work and there on my station was a note that said, “Here’s a phone. It’s been wiped and reset, just charge it. Happy Olympics, I love you-Ryan” There was an iphone. And a Daylight Donuts sack with two donuts with red white and blue sprinkles.

That boy knows me. He gave me a phone AND a way to eat my feelings. SO MUCH LOVE.

The phone however, was AT&T.

I’m a Sprint girl.

The phone calls were flowing. The bride and groom had been contacted. They were going to attempt to get my phone back, or replace the one I lost.

Well that both assuaged my anxiety and exacerbated it.

Do you KNOW how much that phone is to replace? Without an upgrade???

It’s an irresponsible amount of money.

And it made me sick that this lovely girl, on the first day of her new life, was dealing with this.

I had some cancellations on my book which allowed for me to hit my Sprint store and get a loaner phone and charger. They really are the nicest people at this store. Amazing customer service. I was at home with my new loaner phone when it rang.

The bride had given us the MF’er’s name, address and phone number.

There were a few phone calls made to said MF’er and he was given a chance to return the phone before I filed a police report. . . which I was going to have to do in order to report it as a loss for my business. It was then explained to the MF’er that anything over 250.00 is a felony.

This phone cost $650.00 to replace.

With the bride and groom in our corner, with the pressure being put on him to return the phone, and the threat of a felony charge…it just so happened that there was another iphone found in his car. He musta picked mine up by mistake.

The FedEx package arrived today. I’m charging it and will take it to Sprint tomorrow to get everything lined back out.

I’m amazed at the rage that came rearing it’s ugly head inside of me. Truly amazed. I found that I was capable of using language and wishing scenarios that are far beyond my daily state of grace.

I’m amazed that this MF’er was so stupid. Just stupid.

I’m amazed that he didn’t ditch the phone somewhere.

But most of all, I am amazed at the amount of support that came POURING into my life in the way of phone calls, research, information gathering and relaying, emails and FB posts, offerings of phones and beheadings and setting shit on fire. From NYC, to New Mexcio, from California to Florida, from Brazil (yup. that’s not a typo) to El Reno to Norman, and everywhere in between, people were painting half of their face blue and sharpening their swords.

I’ve been so wrapped up in the stress of life these past few weeks, finishing summer school, gearing up for my final year of This Grad School Thing, trying not to freak out about the What’s Next that comes after. Dealing with the house and the heat and the general asshattery of the world.

It took one MF’er to unleash a tidal wave of good into my world.

I have no idea how it is that this ended so well for me. I don’t know that I deserve it any more than anyone else deserves a good thing to happen.

Maybe I’ve been living right.

Or maybe I’ve got the best friends in the world.

(prolly that.)

 

1) my phone got stolen.

2.)my phone is being returned. I hope to get it today. It’s a long story and I’ll write about it eventually.

3.) my taxes are finished and I completed my FAFSA, though not on my computer because I’m using the most current OS from Apple and apparently they aren’t compatible yet. I’m still absolutely nervous that I waited too late and won’t get awarded any money. But I’ve done everything I can and hopefully when school begins in three weeks I will get to begin with it.

4.) I’m pretty sure that my 4.0 GPA went to shit this summer with this last class. I’m tired. It was online and those classes do nothing for me and I got lazy. I’m trying to look at it as a pass. Less Pressure to be Perfect. I wrote it on the wall.

5.) I started my Dream Wall. I’m liking it.

6.) Trish is leaving next week. I cant even—

7.) Haven’t done much in the way of searching for a therapist/psychiatrist but have been getting everything from eyerolls, to “that never helps” to suggestions of names. There has been one that has bubbled to the top that I’m going to look into at some point.

8.) It’s too hot to do anything. Certainly too hot to cook. I’m over it.

9.) The stress of all of it was just almost too much this week. I’m just praying for the financial aid to come through.

10.) Five years ago today I said, “enough.” I had stayed awake all night waiting for ExHim to come home, as I had done every night for four years previous. I was done. I left. I have been single for five years. Sometimes I wonder if that’s it. If this is the path I’m on forever. If it’s a choice between that and this…I fucking chose this time and time again.

So. My phone got stolen from the wedding I was working last night.

There are many a good hearted souls working together to make a plan.

I have an emergency phone but seriously it’s emergency only.

I will be carrying my computer with me to work and keeping it plugged in for email/facebook contacts.

my salon number is 405-608-0692

I will be there all day.

I have the iCloud app. I can see where my phone is. It’s in the deep deuce apartments absolutely directly across the street from the law offices where M’Lynn just retired from.

It’s only a phone.

I can’t replace the iphone. It’s too expensive and absolutely irresponsible for me to spend that kind of money.

But offers to help are coming in. I have the Best Buy insurance and I’m not sure if that covers loss/theft or not but it’s worth a shot. I don’t know if the police deal with stolen phones but that too is something we’re looking into.

I don’t have much time until tomorrow to commit to this, so it maybe have to wait. Which makes me a little nuts.

But apparently I need a lesson in patience.

It’s just a thing. Things are replaced.

My last thought before I went to sleep after 3am this morning was…I bet those kids in Aurora wish their only worry was a stupid stolen iPhone.

I’m keeping that in my brain today.

My heart, however,  is plotting revenge. And maybe setting something on fire.

 

I’m excited.

No… like really-woah-excited!

Yeah, it is Friday, but only for the Normals does that mean anything.

I have two bartending shifts this weekend, and I am happy to start working on San Diego Trip funds, but that’s not it.

I’ve got a big paper to research and write, and a handful of assignments to post by Tuesday, but I’m ok with that too, and it means summer school is finally OVER!

Better than all of that?

THE OLYMPICS BEGIN TODAY!!!!!

did you hear me?

I SAID THE OLYMPICS BEGIN TODAY!!!

Who’s excited with me?

USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA!

It gives me chills all over when I think about it. I have all of my flags out (truth be told I never took them back in from Flag Day) I’m on the lookout for some Team USA flags. I do have to work tonight, but I’m looking for iPhone apps to watch, my dvr is set, and I’m ready for 17 days of the best of the best being showcased in a city that I’ve always dreamed of visiting.

The thing is, yes. I do get giddy looking at the pretty swimming boys. I do get hopped up on GIRL POWER when I see Misty May-Treanor and Keri Walsh on the volleyball field. I cheer for all of our athletes. I tear up when I hear our National Anthem played and one of ours steps up on that podium. Truth be told…I tear up when anyone wins. What a thing for those kids, right? I love Bob Costas’ commentary and can’t ever go to bed until he tells me goodnight no matter what time it is. I love the behind the scenes stuff that gives us insight into the lives of the athletes and their families back home. I love those random sports that make you scrunch up your nose and go,”SERIOUSLY? THAT???” What makes a kid sit up one morning and say, “Mom, I want to be the worlds best badmiton player, or rhythmic gymnast???” I love seeing my Today Show people doing all of their “let’s try this sport” segments. I love watching the career of my favorite Michael Phelps…I’ve loved him since the Sydney games. I’m beyond excited for Ryan Lochte…I think he’s going to show up in a big, big way this year. I love it. LOVE IT!!!

But I think what I love the most is that for 17 days, we are united. For a brief moment in this calendar year, the ENTIRE WORLD sends the very best of their best, and stops to support them. We are united in our cheering, in our watching, in our successes and disappointments. For 17 days, the focus is on the light instead of the dark. For 17 days, we are united. Can you wrap your head around it? From the most basic, Kobe and Kevin playing TOGETHER on the same team, to countries, sworn enemies in the same space together.

We. Are. United.

Can you imagine if this world were like that always? Every day?

Yeah, roll your eyes at me. I don’t care. Pollyanna and naive? Sure. Admittedly and unapologetically. I need it. I need the light to win, even for a finite time. I need to see the joy and the hope and the excitement. I need to see the world in a happy place. And I think you do too. I think we all do.

The world rolls on, bills pile in, cars break down, kids get sick and the scale goes up. It’s all still there. All of the ick and the muck. I know that it’s still going to be oppressively hot and gross as The Heat Dome presses down. But for the next 17 days, at Brokedown Palace at least, Joy Rises.

Now. Come on! Who’s with me?

USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA!

 

I’ve been quietly watching this whole Aurora, Colorado dialoge plays out in the world. In the media, on social networking sites, in the salon…it seems that people are all talking about it. And we should be. It was a heinous thing. Beyond comprehension. As the individual stories start to trickle out, as we get to know about the lives of those injured, those killed, and he that did the damage, the underlying theme of the conversation is centered around guns. Guns. Gun control. Gun issues. Guns for purchase legally, and why they shouldn’t be illegal. There are raging words for and raging words against.

As par for the course, anyone who dips their toes into the pool “gun control” is deemed a crazy fucking liberal tree hugger socialist nazi who is trying to take away my God given ‘Merican rights. Just look at the backlash Jason Alexander got on Twitter.  Granted, in the new world of instant publishing that we live in, the aftermath of such a gross thing will illicit knee jerk reactions. But it’s still happening. To his credit, Mr. Alexander is retweeting all of the dissenting tweets as well as the supportive ones. There are more up just this morning.

Now, let’s just kind of look at this from a different angle. Change the words a bit.

I think it’s fine to own your own gun. Get trained. Don’t be batshitcrazy. Know that if the moment comes when you point a gun at another person, you can follow through. Make sure it won’t be removed from your hand and used against you. Make sure you KNOW WHAT YOU ARE DOING. It’s a mental and physical task and you need to make damned sure you’re up to both. Because that slight error in judgement has the potential to change the course of your life and possibly mine, forever.

Do we need military grade automatic weapons ala Scarface available to purchase? Don’t those bullets do the same damage as a handgun or shotgun? Dead is dead, right? When someone is collecting 6000 rounds of ammunition, how come there’s not a red flag? Are there any red flags in this case of James Holms? I think there were, and I think those flags were completely overlooked. The conversation has been centered on the guns, and the ammo and the bombs and supplies he used to booby trap the apartment.

The conversation, in my opinion, needs to change. We need to be focusing on the state of mental illness in our country. They way we look at it, deal with it, fund it, treat it. Look people, this isn’t just a case of “he watched a violent series of movies and decided to kill people.” That’s easy. And irresponsible. For anyone to blame a game or a movie or a song…pull your heads out please and get yourself a big gulp of oxygen to your brain. I think Tracey Letts, playwright and screenwriter, said it best:

“I’m clearly on the side of the argument that say we simply reflect [violence in society],” Letts, a Pulitzer Prize winner for August: Osage County, said. “That crazy motherf—– [in Colorado] had an AR-47 and 6000 rounds of ammunition. Anybody who would point the finger at us and our little fried chicken movie, as opposed to the ability to buy 6000 rounds of ammunition, is out of their goddamn mind.”

When told that conservative radio host Rush Limbaugh had blamed violent Batman movies for the massacre, Letts added, “There you go — consider the source.”

 

Mental illness is prevalent in our society. Did you know that?  “An estimated 26.2 percent of Americans ages 18 and older — about one in four adults — suffer from a diagnosable mental disorder in a given year” Did you know THAT?

We have got to figure out a way to change the words. Change the conversation. This kid, yeah he could be faking the whole thing. I could really be sleeping with George Clooney every Friday night. There are a lot of “could be’s” in the world. It’s your brain and you get to decide what you believe. But I believe that this kid fell through a big fucking crack in our system and as time goes on, more will be revealed.  It’s not sane, educated, trained gun owners who are Falling Down.  It’s the batshitcrazy people who are going through our “proper legal channels” and procuring off the wall amounts of ammunition and big giant guns.

This whole gun debate… look. I don’t want to take away your guns.  I may even want to own one myself. I don’t want to take away the right to bear arms. I want though, some dialogue, serious and real dialogue on why certain arms are NEEDED outside of our military? Dead is dead, right? I want it to be more difficult for the crazy people to get them. I want it to be more difficult for anything like this to happen again. What’s the phrase being bandied about every three seconds on Facebook? “Guns don’t kill people. People kill people.”

Well. Fine.

What can we do about that?

I don’t think anyone will ever calm down the frothy rhetoric enough to look at it. The same phrases spewing back from both sides will continue to spew.

I do think it’s time to change the phrases.

I think it’s time to look at the other layer of this story and ask ourselves, and the people that we vote into office,  what we can do about it.

I think it’s time to change the words.

In the meantime,

May God bless you, Aurora Colorado. May you feel the peace and grace of a nation who mourns with you, who questions for you, and seeks answers for all of us.

I spent about 10 hours yesterday, give or take a whining session, gathering together paperwork to submit my 2011 taxes. This has been that THING, hanging over my head all year and I’ve been head in sand about it because I know that I owe tax payments. It’s been that albatross around my neck, nagging heavily, quietly stealing into every thought, every moment. I have a plan, it just was a matter of getting everything together and submitting it. Oh, and paying for THAT service to the tune of several hundred dollars.

I have misplaced a 1099 form, so I have to locate a copy of that,  and have to fill out one last spreadsheet, then I can take it to my tax person.

It must be finished soon, because my financial aid is dependent on submitting my 2011 tax info.

Everything is connected.

I do feel better having knocked it out. With some whining on the internet and a rousing amount of support in return, I did get it finished. I’ve got everything organized so I’m going to go ahead and get 2012 up to date as well. (right? who am I???)

Homework is knocking on my door as well. I need to get caught up. I haven’t posted since I finished my paper last week. I need to start researching for the final paper as well.

But alleviating this one major thing on my back has opened room to deal with other things:

Go visit Trey at the hospital. My friend had emergency surgery for septis in his arm yesterday. It’s pretty bad, and word is, if he didn’t get to the hospital when he did, he could have died. Trey and I have hanging out nights on a regular, somewhat regular,  whenever we can. Throw some good thoughts his way, would ya?

getting my bedroom window fixed. (yeah. I know. It’s still wrapped in plastic and tape.)

paying bills.

contacting my advisors to set up meetings concerning GRE/Ph.D/Master’s Thesis.

finalizing insurance claim for the new roof.

reorganize the office.

get some butcher paper on the wall and begin my dream page.

find butcher paper…which means probably going to a craft store. . . which means I can get stuff to fix my puppets eye.

ask around about finding a psychiatrist/therapist. I’m considering therapy. I have no insurance. I have no idea how to go about finding someone that is credible and affordable. it’s such a tricky subject…I almost didn’t list it here…fear, anxiety, whatever. I’m putting it out there. How do you find someone?

I’m going to have some more coffee, wish that I lived close enough to go to my mom’s for breakfast, and get started hammering this out.

Finishing on a few good notes:

I bought another fan as an impulse buy at the grocery store this week. I’ve kept both going during the day, and haven’t had to run the a/c nearly as hard as usual. I’m happy for that.

My squash keeps producing. I really want to fry up a mess of it with some okra. Really.

I’m so excited for the Olympics to begin! I work weddings both Friday and Saturday night, so will have to watch the dvr’d version, but I don’t care.

GO TEAM USA!!!

In order for you to understand my story, you’ll need to read about how it all started. I could tell you, in my words and phrases, but it’s already been captured with the perfect words, the perfect phrases. So, go here: Trish’s Blog, and read about how it all came to pass.

I’ll wait.

What do you think? Crazy, huh? Traveling across the state lines, in a car with people I’ve never traveled with before (save Trish. We travel well together.) With people that I’ve never spent more than an evening or an afternoon with, actually, certainly not as a group. Forging our way out from under the Heat Dome, to meet another group of people we had never met.

Yet, we knew them. I knew them. We knew each other, deeply and profoundly. In my heart, I knew one in particular. We’ve texted each other and emailed singularly and in group mailings for a year now. I knew that she was a sister of my soul. The other girls, I was intrigued and excited to meet. I didn’t know as much about them, but I knew enough to know I wanted more! Oh how I would come to love them, all of them.

As we drove into New Mexico, we saw the temperature begin to drop. We felt the altitude change. There was an energy in the car, buzzing. Each of us has our own experience, so I won’t speak for any other than mine. I wasn’t scared, or nervous really. Mostly excited. It never occurred to me that I wouldn’t like anyone, or that they wouldn’t like me. I felt it in my bones that we were approaching something magical. There was about to be a merging of some really amazing personalities, and whether it was like Macy’s NYC Fourth of July Extravaganza…or San Diego’s Flop, it was going to be bright and memorable.

It was.

That and so much more.

These women that we had never seen face to face, never smelled or touched or hugged, were just as they should be. Generous. Hysterical. Caustic. Shy. Gentle. Caring. Bawdy. Open. Loving. Beautiful.

For me, it was the final piece of the puzzle.

I’ve been waiting for you. My whole life, I’ve been waiting. All is as it should be.

I’ve never been one to hold in my feelings. Except the ragey parts of me that stay tucked away, I learned a long time ago that I could either swallow and bury the emotion, or release it and make room for more. It is just the way I am made, and I’ve accepted it. It’s probably unnerving to strangers, to see me burst into tears, then laughter, then just try to stop the flow leaking from my face. I have no idea why no one has attempted to admit me into the nervous hospital. Maybe they can sense that it’s ok. All is as it should be.

There was many a tear leaking from my eyes last week.

Taking it all in, the grace of it all, and the route we took to get there. What if? What if we had never which meant we would have never, which would have never let us know, which would have never lead us here…

All is as it should be.

I’ve been asked, “what did you DO?”

Well, some of us shopped. Some of us rafted the Rio Grande. Some played backgammon. I did bang some hair. Some of us cooked…seriously it was like a scene from “Like Water For Chocolate”…you could taste the love in each bite.

Mostly, though, we talked. We talked and talked and talked and talked.

From heart break, to family, to love lost, to favorite recipes and personal triumphs, to favorite YouTube videos and dancing goats…we covered it. I came away knowing more about each of us than I did before the trip. Making connections that will forever bind us together.

And it was all too short.

Anyone that knows me, knows I hate goodbyes. From the time I was just a little girl, I would cry…CRY huge wailing tears when I would leave. Anyone. I’m crying now typing this. I remember being about 5 or 6 and asking my dad to just…just BUILD us a house big enough for everyone I love, and we’ll never have to say goodbye again. So when the time came, in the afternoon in the middle of Taos, to go our separate ways, I tried to hold it together. And I’m pretty proud of myself. There was no wailing. No uh-huh-huh-ing trying to get my breath. It was Au Revoir-o-till-next-time-o-chick-a-lingas! And we were off.

In the days past, readjusting to life under the Heat Dome, processing the thing we just experienced, I’ve come to understand two things.

One: I know now, why I wasn’t really nervous. I’ve done this before. I’ve traveled miles and miles to live with strangers. That’s how I met Kizz. Only in those experiences, we hadn’t been each others sounding board for a year previous. It was a Yahtzee, buckle up, herewego, kind of thing. Not always pleasant, but sometimes magical. So, this experience was in my wheelhouse already.

Two: For a moment there, my wish was realized. I was in a house, full of people that I loved and that loved me back. There was beauty all around us, and even in the smallest detail, there was grace. What a lucky, lucky girl I am to have the opportunity to fully experience it, to realize it and to know that,

all is as it should be.

**All photos taken by, and belong to Trisha Boonshay, Documentarian Extraordinaire.

Taos is beyond words. Amazing…awe inspiring.

Yesterday consisted of the whole group getting here, the house getting stocked with provisions and libations. I did some corrective color which took awhile, therefore we were really late getting in to town for food and drink…hindsight we just should have stayed here. The place was crowded, the band was loud, the food was fine but we ate had a drink and came right back to our fabulous adobe hut and put on soft clothes or bathing suits and got into the hot tub under the stars.

Oh the stars…they are so loverly.

Trish and I are up. After only five hours of sleep…wide awake.

All I can hear in my head is Jack’s voice, “Come one let’s go we’re wasting daylight!”

I’m going to get a cup of coffee and go stare at the mountains and breathe.

And tell Jack’s voice to shut the hell up.