What a glorious vacation. Camping in the beautiful Colorado mountains, waking up with the crisp air, cooking over a camp stove, being with friends and hearing great music. Let’s just say that the re-entry to reality was a rough one yesterday.

I fell asleep in the middle of a conversation with Mark. Literally. He was talking to me about the closing costs and closing papers and repairs to finish this sale of my house and I just fell smooth asleep.

There are lots of things chomping at our heels right now, getting back into the groove with our house that still needs unpacking, my office that still needs unpacking, all of the recruitment stuff from August, the students are back at OU, Mark is understaffed and so ridiculously overworked it just blows the mind.

But for now, we are holding on to the Colorado magic, singing together around the campfire. We only have one song together so we’ll be learning a few more before next year. We met some fabulous camp neighbors who sang with us and ate with us and laughed and talked with us for the week. We plan to camp with them again next year.

I’ll tell you all about the festival in a few days. I’ve got some fun stories and photos.

But really, what I want to tell you today is that yesterday…I paid my very last house payment. My very last mortgage payment on Brokedown Palace. We are set to close either Friday or Monday. We have 30 days past closing to finish the repairs. I’m taking a pretty awesome loss on the house. There will be no money after I pay for the HVAC replacement and the other repairs. In fact, I’ll have to borrow money to finish the repairs. SO the hope of paying off the other credit cards and getting out of debt with this sale is an empty one. But it is what it is. I’m finished with that place and the stress and agony that it’s given me. I take with me the memories and the laughter and the backyard parties that brought us all such great times together. Julie will have a really safe and sturdy house to turn into a home with her own special magic. I can’t wait for it to be hers and not mine. So there is that for some forward motion!

The air is clean and crisp and while the temps are still scorching in the upper 90s during the day, the mornings are full of Fall. That makes me happy.

 

This weekend is the Gentlemen of the Road festival in Guthrie. It’ll be a fun time, and hopefully I’ll start getting excited about it soon. I’m excited to see Cindy and meet her fella. I’m excited to see Talaura and for all of us to have some facetime together. It’s going to be 98 on Saturday. That sucks. But the music will be great. Mumford & Sons, Alabama Shakes, Edward Sharpe. So good. As of now, there is no way I’m camping. I want to be home. But we’ll see what the week brings.

So ending the week by selling a house, seeing good friends, hearing great music?

That’s not a loss at all.

Right now, in Pagosa Springs, it is 52 degrees.

Highs in the 80s during the day, 50s at night.

The trailer is packed. Mark is taking the car for maintenance at 7:30. While he’s gone I’ll finish packing the kitchen bits, my personal getting ready bits and put the house back to rights.

I’m not relaxed yet. I’m not even close. My brain is still running lists of things we need for this trip, things for my job, things for the closing of the house* and things for when we get back.

Those voices have about 8 hours the shut the hell up. When we pull into the Santa Fe National Forrest this evening…I want nothing but radio silence up there.

I’ll probably post pics on Instagram. But I won’t be writing.

Prayers for traveling mercies for us and our friends that are also going, and I’ll see you on the flip side.

 

**appraisal came through on my house. we are set to close on the 16th. In fact I’ll have all of my papers signed next week. Then we have to clear out the garage and make the repairs. We should be finished with this project by the end of September/first of October. Thank God. I’ll pay one more mortgage payment. That is all.

 

I finished a long day of work and dealing with volunteers and seeing just how dysfunctional the information flow really is with one of my/all of my/ CSTs yesterday around 5pm. I had to come home and put myself down for a little 30 minute nap. When I got up, Mark was cleaning our trailer. Hand washing her with the utmost of care, running the battery to test the lifespan, airing it all out, measuring for ice chests….really other than fresh bedding she is ready.

We walked up to Lion’s Park and did a quick run through of Midsummer Night’s Fair which is a juried arts show that happens in the same park that Summer Breeze uses. It was a little over 4 miles round trip that we walked and when we got home we sat on the porch and talked. We do that every night. We sit on the porch and talk and talk and talk until we have more yawns than words coming out of our mouths. Both of us have so much work to do with our jobs before we leave. Our hearts however, are already on the mountains.

Today has been spent prepping for tonights concert. Elephant Revival is the last band we saw at Harvest Fest last year. I love them so. We’ll seen them next week at Four Corners. Tonight, Norman gets to see them for free. I am continuously amazed at the things Mark does for the community. It’s a lot of work. But the payoff is pretty awesome.

As much as we are busy, and frenzied and getting caught up in our routines, it’s really nice to go sit under the stars and watch some magic happen on a stage in a park. That’s my sacred Sunday time.

Yesterday was full of meetings, beginning at 9:30 with an All Staff, some rearranging of afternoon meetings into lunch meetings, more meetings. Then it was pile things in my car from the Mar/Com closet and head out to Shawnee for the Spotlight on Shawnee event. This was a community event, set up on a downtown street that was blocked off and used as a welcome for OBU students. I went with the expectation that I would a) get some time spent with my CST Manager. b) get the face of Girl Scouts back out and visible in the area and c) MAYBE get a few names of students that could possible volunteer some time, perhaps the music major can work a music badge with the troops, or the Physical Ed/Vollyball girls can work a PE badge with the troops. Something. Maybe I would get a few names for the Alumni Association. I hear this “I used to be a Girl Scout” so many times in the recruitment events, and it doesn’t matter if you were “just” a Brownie, or if you completed through your Gold Award. Once a Girl Scout Always a Girl Scout, so you are viable for this alumni.

I got an entire sign up sheet. Four Gold Award girls, some photography majors who want to help with the photography badge, and about 80% of the list were happy to get info on the Alumni Association. *it looks great on a resume.

I didn’t get home until well past 9…closer to 10pm.

I’m doing it all again tonight and again tomorrow from 1-3 here in Norman.

Send me some energy, some positive forward motion that I can send into the communities. We must have adults who can give a few hours of their time to these girls. We have GOT to find the people who can be a role model, who can help with one event, who can help with more than one event. We have to find these people or the girls don’t get to form troops. We have to find these people or the volunteers already in place become even more over worked and closer to burnout.

I approach this with my Stone Soup Girl Scout Theory.

If one person can do one thing one time a month…

If one person can do one thing two times a month…

If one person can do one thing for four weeks…

We have a troop.

We have girls who are able to participate and to learn and most importantly, we have girls who once a week get told how amazing they are, how awesome they are doing in life and how fabulous they are going to be in the future.

That’s the thing right there. That’s the thing.

So send some of your magic over these events please.

 

Meanwhile back at the ranch…

We are frantically working on getting ready for our trip. Mark has been checking things off of his list…(his lists have sublists). We have some errands and things to really buckle down and do this weekend and I think we will be ready. Hell. We were ready last night.

My office is shaping up. I still don’t have a complete desk but my IT guy is coming down today to finish the electronics/printer. I’ve got much computer work to be done today. Follow up from the events/meetings yesterday. My employee is set with work for the next week while I’m gone so that’s good.  Trish is shopping for fabric for my window treatments today. I think I’ll go buy my own chair. *I will not get mad about my office today. I will not get mad about my office today. I will not—*

Brokedown Palace is getting a new HVAC system. The price came in exactly where I thought it would. The guy opened the door to the existing unit and physically gasped. Apparently there is great wonder as to why I lived there and escaped harm. I get so pissed off when I think of the “a/c guy” I had inspect it, and what the hell the actual inspector did to say “this unit is janky but you’re safe” Pfffft. I feel really good about Julie having it now though. It will be safe. The bills will be SO MUCH LESS. It will be good. We’re still on track, just need the appraisal to come through.

It’s time. Time for me to giddy up and gulp and go.

Happy Friday, ya’ll.

I got office furniture delivered yesterday. Finally. Four days w/o any kind of desk and when they showed up…well let’s just say it was total bullshit.

I didn’t get to pick out this furniture. Timing being what it was, and the facilities director dropping the ball on ordering the stuff, then I didn’t get to pick it out. I saw a photo via text and thought ok. That’s fine. Well “they” brought it. There are pieces missing. They just plopped them in the middle of the office. I tried to arrange it so that it worked, not realizing there were pieces missing. I ganked my back a little. The a/c wasn’t working properly in there either. Push came to shove…literally…and I sent a raging text that said COME PICK THIS SHIT UP.

If this is the way we’re going to “set up a branch office” by the way that we are not killing ourselves on in rent, then screw it. I’ll go buy it myself.

The chair “they” sent was something-my hand to God- that was picked up at a garage sale. It is bullshit.

There were many texts and phone calls. I calmed down…a little. Only after I lost it to the Facilities Director AND the IT guy. Poor Chad.

My last text was to Mark. Come help me move this shit.

And his brain worked. He saw what was happening, where the missing piece was supposed to be, he could move the super heavy stuff around…he made some sense out of chaos.

My brain just couldn’t see it. Thankfully his did.

Today is the first of the next three days I’ll be in Shawnee. I think Trish is going to sew me up some curtains and such for the office. I’ve got a Kurieg in sight. It’ll start coming together I know.

Who knew that office furniture could be such bullshit? I didn’t. I do know that poor customer service will send me over the edge like no ones business. There’s no excuse for it. None.

One last gulp of coffee and it’s off to see what today brings!

When I started That Grad School Thing all those years ago I was so worried about juggling all of the things Bill told me these sage words:

“we’re all juggling. the key is knowing what balls will bounce and which ones will break”

It seems as if I not only take those words to heart daily, but I espouse them to all of my volunteers and potential volunteers as well.

I thought I’d just do a quick rundown on the balls in the air at the moment.

*I checked in with my advisor for finally finishing Grad School and the hoops I have to jump through. The Comps are scheduled for September 24. Five weeks. Five weeks and I will go sit, write my heart out (again) and pray for a pass.

*Brokedown Palace is still in contract. There are inspections and negotiations and a few major repairs to be done. We’ll know more after Thursday as to if we are keeping our original closing target date of Sept 16.

*My job is nuts. I have an office with no furniture. Files on the floor, boxes, some electronics turned on, some waiting the furniture. The BTSNs are finished. Recruiting events start this week. I’ll be in Shawnee Thursday and Friday nights. Norman Saturday day. Once the information is captured the real work begins in forming troops, placing girls, getting volunteers properly signed up, background checked, and trained to lead. We have goals, that have been set, given to our volunteer officers and now they are going to change. I have an employee that I don’t have a for sure plan for yet who cannot office with me as there is no room for her as there is no furniture or organization yet. She too will have goals that I will need to set and ensure that she meets. I’m happy with the confidence in my ability. I have moments where I just want to damn worry about my own self. This is where I leap and trust that the net appears.

*Our House is a Very Very Very Fine House. With two cats…that have worms. ugh. After two hours at the vet on Saturday morning we have dosed them and are on our way to being worm free.

*We still live among boxes and disorder. I have no idea when I will give a shit about unpacking again.

*Our trailer is working. Electronics, all of it. Just some cleaning and planning and packing and we’ll be ready to go. That is THIS CLOSE to getting crossed off the list.

*bills. bills. bills. Just ready to only pay at one house.

It’s really no more than anyone else in the world. I’ve always said that the only reason my stuff is important, is because it’s mine. Your’s is just as important. I sometimes get so buried that I feel…buried.

I’m juggling. Dropping some..so far they’ve all bounced.

The weeks are a blur.

Every day last week was full and long, every single night was spent at a Back to School Night doing recruiting for Girl Scouts. Things are shaping up there. I’m in my office in Norman, though I have a folding card table and folding chair and many boxes. I’m destined it seems for the time being to live out of boxes.

Our house is in a living place. There are still boxes in the office. There is still stuff in the garage at Brokedown Palace. But we worked ourselves numb last weekend making the house liveable. That has been priceless. I’m thankful for the house being clean enough and put together enough for Mark’s family to have been here last night.

It seems that the only moments of peace are those we find right before we crash. Sitting on our porch, talking mostly of the things we have got to get done in the upcoming days. . . but I’m thankful for those moments.

So many stories I think about writing. I fell at one of the BTSN’s and since then the bruises are fairly awesome, but my wrist if janky. I have a wrist guard that I’m wearing periodically. I think it’s just bruised and maybe a little sprained. But damn. Falling sucks. The children I’ve met at the schools are all so full of awesome and energy and excitement for the new. Even and especially the kids in the Moore school district.

I have an employee now. She started last week unbeknownst to me, so I have some catching up to do, and now there are goals to set and those goals are dependent on my goals and bla bla bla GAAAAAAAH!. shit. My brain is fractured into a million tiny cookies, each one working on a project that in and of itself could be a full time job.

Mark worked like crazy this weekend on our trailer. She is ready to roll! The hitch is attached, the wiring is a go. All we really need is to do some cleaning, and making our lists of what stuff to take and we’ll be ready to hit the road to Colorado in 10 days.

I don’t know when I’ve needed a vacation more.

Oh wait.

Last year, right before I went to Harvest Fest. That’s right.

Saturday morning was spent at the vet with Sam. He’s got the worms. Ugh. It was a good hour and a half and the woman who was our intake nurse person almost got chopped in half. Lucky for her the vet stepped in and we came home with the proper meds and all will be well.

The house is under contract. We had the inspection last week. There are . . . things that have come into play, as one might expect with that place. I think it will all work out. Well. It will. One way or another. I don’t know if we’ll be able to stay on our timeline though and that sucks for all involved. Just really ready for it to be off of our plate.

I have so many other things in my head…so many thoughts buzzing around. I miss writing on a daily basis. Clearly life has transitioned back into that place where I must force myself to take time to write. The entire reason I started this blog to begin with all those years ago.

I’m really thankful though, for all of it. For all of it. For not having to sit at the vet alone. For not having to make a thousand decisions and choices alone. For being able to turn to someone else and say, “what do you think?” and get an answer. For that I’m so thankful.

It’s a blur right now. Recruitment. The return of the students and his job being crazy. Impending trips and houses for sale and boxes boxes boxes.

Someday soon though it will calm down. Someday.

August.

I’m finishing my first week of The Month. I’ve been gone every night. Last night’s CST meeting was in Shawnee, I got home after the 10 o’clock news had already started.

Mark had an unruly and unusually jacked up day yesterday.

We are living among boxes and hallways full of mattresses and trying to find the time to get things wrapped up at the house. That sale looks like it is in the works, but it’s happening in an odd and super fast way, so I’ve been trying to get my end prepared.

I had to cancel the trip to Arkansas this weekend. We just have too much to do.

I’m so sad about that. I need to see my family.

But we also have to get this house taken care of. And we have to get these boxes moved and unloaded and finished.

And next week I have exactly one night where I don’t have a recruiting event.

But you know what? I fucking love this job.

And these women volunteers in my district? I think I’ve got most of them to believe me when I say that this is important work we’re doing. And the opportunity to tell a girl that she can in fact do anything, is not only a honor but it’s something that we should be able to offer all girls. Not just the ones in the age range we want to work with. Every. Girl.

I get my dvr today. It was but for the Grace of Lilli my friend and I could’ve gotten it yesterday but I had zero minutes. Today! DVR! Breaking Bad begins Sunday!

Which means that this time last year we were in Taos. Sigh.

This month. . . woof. I don’t know if I have the bandwidth to survive. I will likely arrive at my office with wet hair more days than not. I will likely have to write myself notes and between the eleventy million full time jobs we have going, Girl Scouts, OU, Norman house, sell Brokedownnomore Palace, find time to be with family, get ready for Colorado which means car maintenance, camp prepping and gathering, find time to be with friends, get the house in order so that we can have our friends over….I don’t know if I have the bandwidth to do it all perfectly well.

But I will do it with the secure knowledge that I’m exactly where I am supposed to be. There is love in this house. There will be some order soon. And this morning, I get to take some cookies to a friend who had some bad news this week.

Then it’s time to take on the world.

This weekend will be brought to you by the words Friends and Nesting.

I came home this afternoon, Friday Im finished early but even earlier today as I needed to meet one of my CST managers in Norman and deliver some supplies and wound up having an impromptu 20 minute meeting. Anyways, I came home this afternoon with full intent to unpack a few boxes, move some things around and out, make some headway.

I napped. Hard. Hard hard sleep.

I’m so tired it seems.

Last night I was dead asleep, and apparently stole every pillow in the bed and when Mark tried to retrieve his, I growled. “But I dont have a pillow” to which apparently I replied,”that’s not my problem” and went back to sleep.

Lord.

Tonight, we are gathering for delicious food and friends and music and fun. My favorite kind of night. Tomorrow Trish is going to come over and we’re going to take a pass at arranging things in the house before we go see her kiddo in the Sooner Theatre show. The weekend will finish off with unpacking and nesting and grocery shopping and prepping for the upcoming weeks. Next week I work every night but wednesday.

It begins.

This weekend, we rest and enjoy our time.

Mom and BonusDad have been married for 25 years this week. Yesterday in fact.

Twenty. Five. Years.

I remember it like it actually WAS yesterday. We put this sweet little wedding together in the front yard of Barbara and Otis’ yard, raffia bows hung from the tree limbs (it was 25 years ago. raffia.) My sister and I sung about eleventy million Anne Murray songs.

I remember that Burl promised to love us. All of us.

And he has. For 25 years he has loved us, when we were at our most unloveable.

And she has loved him. Through the really really bad times, and the good. Steadfast beside each other.

He has the patience of Job. And maybe he wasn’t that way the first time around, maybe he wasn’t that way with his kids, but he was with us.

He bought me prom dresses without a blink, helped me with my car issues and joined forces with my father to pack me up and move me home when my first marriage disintegrated.

They have had their ups and downs. They have seen the births of their grandchildren and the loss of their parents. They are a witness to each others’ life.

And that’s really what we want in this world, right?

For Better. For Worse.

Happy Anniversary Burl and Mom. You’re doing it right.